Defining Reality and Giving Hope

Open door on a beach - opportunity.
 

The great general Napoleon Bonaparte is credited with saying: “The role of the leader is to define reality and give hope.”


“The role of the leader is to define reality and give hope.” - Napoleon Bonaparte


While true at all times, this is especially true during times of severe crisis – such as the one we’re currently facing.  This is when leaders need to balance realism with optimism.

I offered some thoughts regarding this in my blog post “The Key to Crisis Leadership”.

However, I recently came across a blog by a pastor named Eric Garner in which he offered some additional insights on the balance of realism and hope that I thought might be helpful as we go through this prolonged season of challenge.

Garner notes that the order seen in Napoleon’s quote is exceedingly important. He writes, “There is a temptation for leaders, in moments of crisis, to jump to giving hope. But doing so fails to meet people in their pain.”


“There is a temptation for leaders, in moments of crisis, to jump to giving hope. But doing so fails to meet people in their pain.” – Eric Garner


 

Legitimize Lament

These days, such pain is as widespread as it is case-specific.  People are grappling with all sorts of painful realities in this current situation: confusion, disappointment, loss, depression, and fear. In a word, folks are grieving. 

To be sure, their people might be grieving the loss of a loved one.  But grief is broader than that.  They can also be grieving the loss of relational connectedness, the loss of innocence, the loss of a job, the loss of their savings, the loss of a long-anticipated vacation, the loss of an opportunity (such as playing sports), or the loss of a celebration (such as a wedding or graduation).

Great leadership does not ignore such realities or sugarcoat them. Nor does it speed through them. 

Taking the time to mourn with those who mourn legitimizes their lament.  It demonstrates not only sympathy (feeling compassion or sorrow for the hurts of others) but empathy (identifying with them in their hurt).


Taking the time to mourn with those who mourn legitimizes their lament. 


Such validation allows the struggling person to give vent to their pain and even their anger.  It allows individuals to pour out their hearts to God confident in the fact that He hears, understands, has tender regard for us in our weaknesses, and is there to provide comfort and help.

The people of God down through the ages have poured out their hearts to Him in such ways.  Prophets such as Habakkuk and Jeremiah voiced their confusion and frustration and were never rebuked for doing so.

Another example is King David. That “man after God’s own heart” certainly knew what it was to lament.  Many of his psalms candidly articulate his pain.  Take, for example, these words from Psalm 6: “I am weary with my moaning; every night I flood my bed with tears; I drench my couch with my weeping” (Ps. 6:6).

Or Psalm 13 where David cries out, How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?  How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? (Ps. 13:1-2)

As with other psalms of lament, David eventually gets to hope; but he begins by defining his current reality. And he does so with utter candor.

People long for permission to do this. Good leadership gives it and, indeed, encourages it.

 

Hold out Hope

However, just as there are leaders who will jump too rapidly to “giving hope,” there are leaders who will loiter for too long “defining reality.”

Yes, there is grief. Yes, there is loss.  Yes, there is pain. Yes, life is hard now.

But if that is all people are left with, they won’t be served well. People long, even need, to hear that there is hope. Scripture tells us, “hope deferred makes the heart sick” (Proverbs 13:12). Leaders must give that hope.

  • Hope that this painful season will not last forever.

  • Hope that they will in fact get through this. 

  • Hope that God is still on the throne. 

  • Hope that God is still working out His plans and fulfilling His purposes.

  • And hope for a glorious world to come when there will be no more sin, no more suffering, no more sickness, and no more death.

What is the balance of defining reality and giving hope? Like most leadership disciplines, this is much more art than science. And in a global pandemic like this one, we should expect to continually toggle between the two.


What is the balance of defining reality and giving hope? Like most leadership disciplines, this is much more art than science. And in a global pandemic like this one, we should expect to continually toggle between the two.


Meaning that our grieving is not going to be over when we offer hope. And yet, even during intense moments of defining reality, we don’t grieve as those without hope.

We won’t always get it right.  Yet as we juggle these two aspects of leadership, even imperfectly, our people will be served well.


 
 

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